Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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