I looked at my own cervix.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Stone age, man.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning