Texts From Last Night

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  (515): View more from Iowa

  Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Beat you to it.

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  (515): Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card? (847): Beat you to it. http://tfl.nu/fyxy
  Replies (9) Good night (1796) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  summer is not the time to consider going full bush.

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  (337): summer is not the time to consider going full bush. http://tfl.nu/4smx
  Replies (71) Good night (752) Bad night (3923)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.

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  (902): Her vagina smelled like hockey gear. http://tfl.nu/kiqt
  Replies (39) Good night (755) Bad night (7091)
• Favorite

  (951): View more from California

  better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???

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  (951): better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life??? http://tfl.nu/fjyx
  Replies (14) Good night (6168) Bad night (914)
• Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.

  (319): View more from Iowa

  Good thing spelling doesn't count.

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  (641): I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test. (319): Good thing spelling doesn't count. http://tfl.nu/8f4i
  Replies (23) Good night (6679) Bad night (981)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day

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  (917): Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day http://tfl.nu/w2yk
  Replies (29) Good night (4926) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.

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  (573): You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes. http://tfl.nu/p4s9
  Replies (23) Good night (6795) Bad night (2215)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.

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  (859): I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college. http://tfl.nu/f01w
  Replies (9) Good night (4782) Bad night (1152)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  i robbed the continental breakfast last night

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  (208): i robbed the continental breakfast last night http://tfl.nu/xq3y
  Replies (8) Good night (2889) Bad night (864)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.

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  (909): It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer. http://tfl.nu/6a0i
  Replies (5) Good night (540) Bad night (1876)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.

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  (443): I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer. http://tfl.nu/9juw
  Replies (3) Good night (946) Bad night (448)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.

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  (714): There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody. http://tfl.nu/evby
  Replies (5) Good night (824) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.

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  (716): I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender. http://tfl.nu/johq
  Replies (1) Good night (539) Bad night (355)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?

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  (949): It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right? http://tfl.nu/5yrq
  Replies (2) Good night (284) Bad night (144)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics

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  (714): I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics http://tfl.nu/rtl0
  Replies (3) Good night (367) Bad night (143)

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