'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize