i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
there was a trapeze. enough said
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
