his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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