Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
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