using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
