"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Michael Bay diarrhea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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