Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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