so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
