what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
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