no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
