every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
