I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Randomize
