Buhtt sex?
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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