Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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