Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
