what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
