Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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