I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize
