i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Randomize