is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
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