People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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