New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
