"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
