what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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