oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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