At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
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just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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