It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
