some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
