Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
