Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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