ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
