i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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