I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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