I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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