trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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