you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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