i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
