Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
