so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize