So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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