If i come over, it means nothing
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize
