Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
