Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
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I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
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You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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