Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
