well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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