Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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