it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
