ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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