i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
